My First Trip Abroad Part 1: "Are you ready?"
“Are you ready?”…I couldn't even begin to tell you how many times I was asked this question in the weeks and days leading up to my departure. Concerned parents wanting to ensure you don't forget anything, excited friends living vicariously through you, waiting and wanting to hear all about it once you're there.
For someone like me, that question can provoke so many other emotions that couldn't be further from excitement. The more I got asked that question, the more nervous I became about not being ready. Prior to booking my trip, I lived majority of my life in fear. I lived ball and chain to my routine and you wouldn't find me breaking it for anyone. I would over-think, consider every possible factor, and focus on all the reasons why it was too "inconvenient" to travel. I'm sure to the regular travel bug, you can't even imagine what that logic might look like. What's there to lose, right? If it weren't for a recent string of severely life changing events, I wouldn't have taken that step back to realize I was isolated in this zone I had created for myself. I wouldn't have realized hey - wait - I can't be wasting any more time living like this. I've got opportunities and some serious missed time to make up for! Your 20's are your selfish years, after all.
Sometimes my old ways still haunt me, and I'll find myself inducing a panic attack by my own thoughts. I found that cutting them off as soon as they happened helped me a lot. For my trip to Central, this was quite frankly my only method of remaining calm as I tried to fit as much comfort of home in one backpack. If I find my mind wandering to a negative place, I'll just remind myself that I will cross that bridge when I get there.
From learning to trust the universe and the unknown, life has opened up for me in a way I will never stop being grateful for. And as thankful as I am sometimes to have a brain that works OT, I've learnt that you always have to let go of what you can't control.
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